Behind "The Ramblings".

Since it seems like I have a lot of new followers that I don't know personally, I thought I would write a little blurb on myself... Because this is a platform that narcissism is not only acceptable, but encouraged.

-- My name is Lauren Steele.
-- I hail from the great mitten state.
-- I am currently 19 years old.
-- I have been with My Marine for two years this September.
-- And by with, I mean we text, like ALL the time.
-- Coffee is my muse and my vice. I drink it black, no sugar.
-- I was homeschooled from 1st grade through 12th.
-- I lived in Louisville, Kentucky from September 2013 - December 2014.
-- Culinary school is what drug me down south.
-- I have an extreme love-hate relationship with snow.
-- Yes, my hair is natural.
-- No, you can't touch it.
-- Things I need in the morning; Coffee, Jesus, and some friggen quiet.
-- I love dark (and I mean DARK) chocolate, Thai food, and Instagram.
-- I used to inline speed skate, like Apolo Ohno, but with wheels and slower.
-- I worked at my local skating rink for about five years.
-- I waitresses at a pizza place for less than three months, I was horrible at it.
-- I am a klutz, which is why I was a bad waitress.
-- I am an American of Welsh/German decent, not Irish, the hair and freckles lie.
-- Rescue dogs are a weakness of mine, I have had two, and planning on more.
-- Dream vacation: New Zealand.
-- I am a huge geek.  Doctor Who, Sherlock, LoTR, and so on.
-- I quote constantly, if I don't make sense, then you haven't seen it enough.
-- Both my parents are vegetarians, and I am slowly joining them.
-- I judge new friends on whether or not they have seen/like The Princess Bride.
-- I have tons of unread books on my shelves. I keep buying more and lying to myself about reading them.
-- I started this blog because I wanted to review books and movies. That didn't work out apparently.
-- I am a horrable speller. Always have been, always will be.
-- I am a minimalist when it comes to clothing and jewelry.
-- I am 5'9" and have man hands... such is my life.
-- I do the same hairstyle everyday for work. Ponytail with a small braid across the front.
-- I hate this hairstyle... it's just super practical.
-- My favorite color is blue. But the shade has varied over time. Currently it is slate blue.
-- I am a huge believer that you can do anything with enough caffeine.
-- I love learning. So naturally I remember all the useless tidbits I hear.
-- I have been singing since I could talk.  Had my first public performance at two years old.
-- If you have read this far, you are incredibly dedicated.  I thank you!

Expected picture of self and handsome man of mine.

To my new followers, drop me a comment and let me know where you are from and how you stumbled upon this humble blog of mine!  Would love to get to know some of you!

An Open Letter.

Oh my sweet boy, how I love you already.  I cannot wait to see you, to meet you, to learn who you are.  My deepest hope is that you are happy in your life, from the time I cradle you in my arms till the time you are cradled in God's.

I pray you will be a silly baby, full of giggles and smiles.

I pray you will be a tumbling toddler, so you learn to stand up on your own.

I pray you will be a loving brother, that you will protect your sibling(s) from the monsters in their lives (under the bed or otherwise).

I pray you will be a dedicated learner, who goes beyond high school and college, someone how craves knowledge and wisdom, always.

I pray you will be a strong man, not only in body but also in mind.

I pray you will be a respectful courter, that you will honor all women and will be wise with the one you chose to call yours.

I pray you will be a diligent provider, one who loves his wife and children, giving of himself for their happiness.

I pray you will have the courage to admit defeat, to seek help when you can no longer stand on your own.

I pray you will be a commanding leader, at home, at work, and in the church.

I pray you will be a humble son of God, that you will listen and lead as He shows you.

I pray you will live a full life, a long life, packed with loved ones' laughter, precious moments, sunsets, and shooting stars.

Don't forget where you came from, but make your own way in life, according to what God has planned for you.  Never forget how much your mother loves you, even now.

Aaron and Michelle

Meet my older brother, Aaron, and his lovely girlfriend, Michelle. I had the pleasure of torturing these two crazies in the frigid wind in downtown Grand Rapids, this past weekend.  All for the sake of art and late Christmas gifts.

These two have been together for a little over four years, and it shows in these pictures. Aaron being the goof that he is, and Michelle patiently (sort of) putting up with him.  These two make me laugh. 

Hopefully this summer I can track them down again, as they rush through their busy schedules, and force them, yet again, in front of the camera. Sans the freezing temperatures and numb appendages.

Cause this was fun!

Thank's you guys!

There and Back Again.

January 5th marked a strange day in my life.  It was the beginning of the winter quarter at Sullivan and I wasn't in Kentucky.  One year ago, I was sitting in an airport, waiting for my delayed flight, headed back to Kentucky after Christmas break.  This year I was watching my friends and family go back to school and work as I stayed in my pajamas till noon.  That's when it really hit me.  I was done with Kentucky.

Despite my grumblings (and yes, there were a lot of them), Kentucky had become my home.  My pictures hung on the walls there, people who make me smile and laugh are there, and there were three happy animals ready to greet me every day.  I worked there, I lived there, it was my home for over a year.

Then my pictures were in boxes, I had said farewell to my friends and had one last hoorah, the animals had successfully hidden in my luggage, I quit my job, I packed my stuff, and I didn't call it home anymore.

Now it is strange, living somewhere I haven't called home in over a year.  I'm not the same person, which is horribly cliched to say, but accurate. In someways I'm better, and in some ways, worse.  I needed to come back to Michigan to heal myself, but I needed Kentucky to break me.

I needed the wake up call that Kentucky gave me, both the good and bad ones.  The realization that I really can do anything for eleven weeks, I really can do this career, I am really not as good as I thought I was, and I really need a lot more help than I let on.

The people I met in Kentucky have changed me forever, whether it me the boys who harassed me for months, or the instructor that literally held me as I cried out for help.  I wouldn't be who I am right now without them.

My time in school not only taught me how to sous-vide a duck breast, but also how to handle life and its curve balls... and there were plenty.  A long distance relationship was started six months early, a suburban girl was thrown into a big city, a fear of abandonment was kicked into overdrive, and I survived my hardest year yet.

There have been days when I regret what happened in Kentucky, who I was there, things that I said, or decisions made under the circumstances.  There are days I wish I had never left Michigan.  But today, as I write this on the brink of starting a new job and more life changes, I miss Kentucky.  The normality that I had become accustomed to is now gone.  I have to find a new normal, and I'm not good with transitions.

Today, I want to be back in my musty apartment, making dinner for myself and getting my uniform ready for tomorrow. Instead I am sitting in my room, with my friend, Erika, sitting on my bed playing music, waiting for my mom to finish my dinner, and dreading driving to my first day of work tomorrow.

In two months, I won't remember what I am feeling at this very moment.  I'll have found my new normal and will be content with it and happier than I ever was in Kentucky.  But that is not today. Today is strange because I was there and now I am back again.